Karachi – messy, slightly dangerous and hot as hell – it’s a place that will infuriate you and seduce you.
This is as cosmopolitan as Pakistan gets. – you’ll meet all sorts in Karachi.
Fast-paced and just a bit insane, it’s a city that will get under your skin.
You will become blasé about security.
Yes, you will become a total
dheet when it comes to Karachi’s
halaat.
Sure,
armed guards are the norm and you instinctively avoid no-go areas but,
in general, life goes on. When strikes, muggings and the like are so
common it’s difficult to maintain a heightened level of worry.
Concerned
relatives from out of town will phone you after a scary news report but
you’re likely to be at a restaurant or GT when they call. No changing
plans unless bullets are actually flying - and if they are, you'll be so
practiced that you can have the shutters down and the drawbridge up in
under 10 minutes.
You will become lazy and totally dependent on your maid
Home help is a luxury that you will rapidly get used to.
You
may have cleaned your whole house, done the laundry, shopped for
groceries AND cooked when you were abroad but now you’ll resent having
to go down to the kitchen yourself to get a cup of tea.
You will get robbed
Consider it a rite of passage and pray that you get off lightly.
Hopefully
the worst that will happen is that someone will steal your wallet or
phone at gunpoint. Some traffic signals are notorious for this and I
have an uncle who faced a gun at two consecutive traffic signals.
Hopefully you won’t be kidnapped or have your home invaded by robbers
but in a city like Karachi there are no guarantees.
You will definitely know someone who’s gone through this horrible ordeal.
Your wardrobe will gradually turn beige and white
It may be our tropical climate or our love
of subtle chic, but Karachi-ites wear a LOT of white, off-white, ecru
and beige. Live here for any length of time and your wardrobe will start
to reflect this.
Your driving will deteriorate
Karachi's pick and mix attitude to traffic laws will get to you sooner or later.
Most
drivers ignore traffic rules completely and operate on the principal of
“might is right”. The horn is king and giving way is unheard of.
You
can try to stick to sensible driving practices but it’s likely that one
day you will decide, “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”.
You will realise that electricity and running water are luxuries
Karachi is definitely better off than many
rural areas of Pakistan but the sort of uninterrupted services you get
abroad are a dream for Karachi-ites.
You will come to rely heavily on your electricity generator and your water tanker
wallah.
You'll become surgically attached to your sunnies
The sun shines here almost 365 days a year.
As glorious as that sounds to those who live in more gloomy climates,
the constant bright sunshine can get to you. If you couldn’t retreat
behind your sunnies, you’d go mad.
You will lose weight
Karachi subscribes wholeheartedly to the adage that “you can never be too rich or too thin”.
The
average socialite in Karachi is significantly lighter than her
counterparts in other parts of Pakistan. You'll find yourself joining
the gym or an exercise class or downloading diet plans.
If you're
coming from abroad, you’ll drop a few pounds from the repeated stomach
infections that you'll get as your body develops immunity to our local
bugs.
You will realise that 'chai pani' is necessary to get anything done
'
Chai pani' has nothing to do with
chai (tea) or
pani
(water) and everything to do with greasing palms. It’s not a
coincidence that Pakistan ranks among the most corrupt countries in the
world.
Your friends will become your extended family
Even though living in Karachi can be a challenge, it holds some of the most generous, warmhearted people in the world.
You will make very dear friends who will be like family.
4:17 AM
US A MA
